Fantards: A Waste of life.

We are all fan of something like I am into videogames and wrestling. On the other hand, we are a fan of someone like I idolize Homer Simpson, Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Nostalgia Critic and Ely Buendia of the Eraserheads fame. We are fans, we idolize, we like them and sometimes we buy and collect stuff with their names on it.

Just like every kind of collection of people, a certain percentage of it consists of complete idiots. They treat their idols, either the human kind or some random thing, like Gods and the only thing missing is to set up a creepy religion praising their idols while dancing in front of the photo of their idol naked, while bathing in blood from a poor Goat in a room surrounded with candles.

Before some weird offended fan throwing feces at my home, here are some fantards that need to go away.

The Collector of Everything
One way to appreciate your idol is to collect stuff with the name or image of their idol plastered. It is perfectly normal if they managed to collect 100% of all available authentic merchandise from their respective idols. It is not normal to collect things that may need you for quick psychological counseling like used chewing gum taken thrown in a trashcan or pieces of fallen hair of a particular idol scattered somewhere. Instead of displaying all the fallen hairs of your idol in your collection, just shove all the vinegar soaked fallen hair one by one up to your candy asses.

Angry Online Fans
They are rabid, they are scary, they threaten you with a premise of being beaten with a stick and be eaten alive, all in written glory. They are everywhere especially in a lot of social media sites and entertain message boards. They will find a minor and very overlooked flaw of their idols’ competition, brag them in a thread then bam, a counter argument from the offended fan complete with at least one usage of profanity and another 500 plus post topic will be born. This fans have no ability to acknowledge other fan group.

Long Que Regulars
This is borderline insane, and mostly happened in other countries. This unfortunate souls are willing to wait for days and nights camping in line while waiting for their most awaited day, which is either the first day of a very expensive product launch or the first screening day of a popular movie. They just entertain themselves by recreating scenes from their other favorite movies through bad acting while being adored by their fellow idiots. Sometimes they even setup small tents as wide as the sidewalk they now stand and plays game consoles on their meticulously constructed outdoor entertainment system.

Extraordinary Creepy Stalkers
The cream of the crap fans that are really in need of proper help like being thrown inside of a rusty drum and enclosing it with a quick dry cement. They will follow their idols all over the place, even in provinces, of course, guided by the tweets of their idols. There are even cases that they will stand in front of their idol’s homes and acting as if their idols know them. If you face them if they start bothering the star or disturbing other people, they will act hostile and threaten you with countless phrases that includes words like sue and any kind of profanity. If you checked out their room it will consist of photos of their idols splattered across 90% of the wall and an opened computer monitor tuned in the twitter of their idol.

Fans should not act creepy and not 100% hardcore in throwing your life away for the sake of your idol. Remember the idol you stalk is not your life, the person may not even acknowledge about your existence even if you stalked your idol in every single way possible . There is nothing wrong for being a fan, but not in a very retarded obsessive way. Just admire them and have a good life.

Impatience Pilipinas

The first ever automated, not 100% computerized, election begins. As expected from anything that has knobs, wires and other scary technical stuff, it has a big chance to malfunction and not work properly. Just like your cellphone, if something went wrong, the only logical thing to do is fix it. Unfortunately, a lot of PCOS machines as they call it goes haywire, starts vomiting and rejecting all the ballots. As the technicians try to fix the machines, combination of our patented tropical heat, long lines and PCOS machine with his paper rejecting skills, many voters choose to say eff it and goes home, and most of them has no plan to return in later time.

We are fine with things we want, like we are willing to stay for a least 2 hours standing in line, waiting for our turn to enter the movie theater. But when it comes to something very important to our life such as our contribution to the election and something goes wrong, we go impatient, starts biting vigorously to our remaining candy in our mouth and decides to head home, watch the TV and point while laughing to the people who chose to stay and kick the ass of our patented tropical heat.

We love to complain, starts finger-pointing and complain more. We are patient while waiting for your food in fine dining restaurants, you may apply this patience level while waiting for your turn to vote. Don’t be a prick and just face the heat since we face the oven heat everyday, even at night. As the PCOS technicians starts reading the PCOS machines for dummies book while they fix the machine, you can do a lot of things while waiting like reading a newspaper, talking to your companions, playing with your PSP but still being alert to snatchers, making new friends to other people in line and other stuff.

Admittedly, I was never got myself registered for the election for reasons so many, so the phrase “if you are not registered, you have no right to complain” may somewhat apply to me but I want to all the registered voters just throw away their angst, wait patiently and exercise your right to vote, but please choose wisely. Don’t worry you can still watch your favorite TV shows that you missed while voting through youtube, if you have a computer and a decent Internet access that is.

By the way if I had myself registered, my vote goes to Gibo Teodoro as president and Jejomar Binay as my vice president, despite my whole family is into Villar for the presidency.

Iron Man 2: A Humble Movie Revi… HOLY SHHH IT WAS AWESOME

Me and Rein just watched one of my most awaited movie of all time, which is Iron Man 2, and man, it delivered and so very awesome. But before we watched a movie, a disaster strikes, I accidentally bumped the rear bumper of the vehicle while parking, damn corner wall, anyway lets forget the metal dent and lets the dent the iron… the last line was lame.

Iron Sequel
The movie is just a basic continuation of the first movie and the government, a business rival and an angry tattooed physicist Russian wants to get on hold of Stark. Stark also deals with his own personal survival since the white chest thing that suppose to save his life is somewhat killing him. I won’t spoil much but I guarantee you that this movie will be one of the best movies of the year, probably one of the best comic based movie ever.

Iron Cast
I am a regular movie fanatic but I am quite meticulous and anal when it comes to acting, fortunately, all of the did well. Robert Downey Jr.’s portrayal of Tony Stark is still remarkable and greatly replicates the comic counterpart. Mickey Rourke’s Whiplash character, he was scary, bad ass and awesome. Scarlett Johannson’s role is also noticeable good, she is subtle but deadly. Both Gwyneth Paltrow and Don Cheadle’s performance were astonishing and I think Cheadle did a better job than that the original guy from the first movie. Overall, everyone did  awe-inspiring acting. Captain America’s shield also made its cameo and I just love the way Stark handled the shield, pure hilarity dickness.

Iron Verdict
Like I said the movie is good, the story was well written and the only negative complain that I can say is that there are more talking than action. When you think a super hero movie you will expect 80% of the film consists of mind-blowing CGI action. In the end, I recommend this movie for everyone, even if you don’t religiously followed the Iron Man comics you will enjoy it thoroughly. Have it in your collection once the original home video version is now in the market. I give this movie 4.5 of 5 stars, Iron stars… god the last line was lame, I think I to need sleep more.