Driving Hell

I may sound like a really broken record here but driving in our country really sucks especially of course in our dear capital, the infamous streets of Metro Manila.

As I type this and all of a sudden, a traffic enforcer with ninja powers came out of nowhere and starts giving me a violation ticket due to complaining about the traffic situation through blogging, here are some things I really, really hate in the roads of Manila.

Jeepney headlights set to off at night
I just recently noticed that many jeepneys traveling at night, and I mean many them, had their headlights off and speeding blindly in the dark. I remember almost hitting a jeep when I was attempting to change lanes and all of a sudden, a  jeep with a switched off headlight swoosh to my lane, complete with the patented angry honking. I asked this to a forum and a guy said the reason many jeepneys doing this is to make their slightly lit route signage attached to their windshield visible at night….. that’s stupid.

Swerving Delight
Filipino drivers just love to insert themselves on every possible space, even swerving drastically from one lane to another, sometimes jumping from one lane to 3 lanes. If you are a sane person, changing lanes is simply checking the lane you are about to switch, use signal lights and change lanes if there is no threat. Here, as usual, it will never work and many times it will lead to collisions and more headaches.

Driving on the line, not in the lane
97% of time, I am always in the middle of the lane. in between the designated right marks. If the road has 4 lanes it should stay that way but a lot of drivers placing their vehicles in the middle of road lines and not being in between the white lines, the 4 lanes became 6 lanes, traffic galore. As expected, as long there is a space in the road, the idiots will insert their vehicles in inappropriate areas, which results to more traffic.

U Turn slots and concrete barriers in inappropriate areas
No wonder there are a lot of news of vehicles getting wrecked by concrete barriers with bad reflectors. Driving with care is still the best way to get yourself safe from point A to B but having dangerous obstacles like concrete barriers placed in areas that most likely to get you car turned into a metal pancake is not really a good idea. Almost a lot of them has reflectors that degraded horribly due to poor maintenance and you cannot easily spot them at afar  especially at night and if you are not really familiar with the place. Bam you just hit a concrete barrier.

Deny Changing Lane Lovers
Some Filipino drivers just want it all. Like when you attempt to change lane after ensuring that there is no immediate vehicle, a faraway car from that lane will suddenly accelerate and block your lane, the only thing missing is to give you a douchebaggery smile. It happened to me many times especially at that accident haven called EDSA. It’s like the driver is a hybrid of Slimer and Lex Luthor, wherein the driver just want it all and the concept of road courtesy thrown out of the window.

Lets head on shall we
Counter flowing is encourage if there is no absolutely oncoming vehicles on the opposite lane. Not here in our country, just like what I said, if there is space, even in the opposite lanes, our dear fellow drivers will be in their speed orgasm trance state again, and speeds up to the opposite lane and dodge incoming cars while honking indiscriminately in joy. They do this to cut the travel time, but really, its making you cut your life faster.

Road courtesy is not existent
Major roads in Manila is chaotic packed with dangerous drivers and accident magnet road obstacles, driving around here is really hell. A lot of them does not follow road rules and I doubt they know what some road sign means.

If you are fast driver, you will be most likely be killed in an accident, and if you are slow one, you will also be mostly killed in a horrible accident. Its like dog eat dog world out there, everyone wants to reach their destination as fast as possible, even if it leads to more accidents.

As other say, if you can survive while driving around the Metro you will not have any problems driving anywhere in the world. There are a lot of delinquent and very unqualified drivers, mostly in public vehicles, tearing up the streets while having experiencing speed orgasm at the same time. We got a number of traffic reducing schemes with great premise but sadly fails in implementation. Lastly, don’t forget about poor road conditions that plagued a lot of our major roads that leads more disaster and sadly,  unnecessary deaths.

Combining them all and we got the recipe of driving hell.

Monumental Disaster Pedestrians

Driving everyday in Manila is hell. Everywhere there are abundance of idiot drivers and poorly placed road obstructions that are meant as U-turn slots. Aside from those mentioned there is a prevalent accident attraction that you see everyday, and these are the selected pedestrians you wish they are prancing around in a demolition derby, with guns.

I am not a fast driver, I am more one with defensive driving. I only use the car as a tool going from point A to B. Crossing pedestrians are a common sight on everyday driving but there are some pedestrians who are total dicks and rather risk both their lives and the ones in the vehicle. Kudos to the remaining pedestrians who knows when to cross properly or actually uses a foot bridge to cross the road, but avoiding sneaky street criminals atop the bridge is another story. These are the pedestrians you watch out for every single day.

Rush Hour Runner
This pedestrians who want to cross the road as fast as possible to the point of running as fast as hell, even there is a number of vehicles, all in a hurry for some reason, hurling towards you. Most of the time they will be hit and sadly killed on the spot.

Got Stuck on One Side
They are the ones who cross the road who does not look on other direction for some reason. They always look at one direction, mostly the opposite side and does not look at the other way. I don’t know why I always see them on both Legazpi and Salcedo side of Makati. One of the most important things to do before or while crossing the road is to look both ways. Having your neck stuck on one side will have a bigger chance to be… struck by a vehicle driven by a maniac.

Headset Head On
Similar with “Got Stuck on One Side” person, but this time, he is distracted to look both ways because the fool is on his head set, listening to some music, and oblivious around him. They are the ones mindlessly crossing the road, in a very slow pace, in deep trance with the music and not hearing the honks of vehicles blaring all over the place.

Middle of the Road Loaders, Motherfu….
I loathed rampaging buses in EDSA, but combine with this imbeciles, you are closer for more accidents. This kind of people will flag down a public vehicle like a bus in the middle of the road, and ascend the vehicle, still in the middle of the road, while other blood thirsty drivers throwing themselves in the road in scary, rush hour fast manner. Jeepneys are notorious of loading and unloading passengers in the middle of the road. There are times I see a mother carrying her infant, running in the middle of EDSA, just to ascend the bus she flagged down.

Footbridge Allergic Scumbags
The footbridge is one of the safest way to cross the street. Yet, this imbeciles who has obvious footbridge allergy will not use one, even if it is only few meters away. According to these idiots, its faster to cross the road rather than use the footbridge. It is someway true but you are always at death’s door whenever you attempt to cross a Manila street. Use the goddamn footbridge for god freaking sake.

Irresponsible and careless pedestrians can create monumental disasters on the road. There are a lot of simple but 100% effective ways to cross the street, like using the right pedestrian lane and usage of a footbridge or like in Makati, an underpass. Next time you walk around and attempt to cross the road, just stop and ask yourself if I do this may I live another day? if you immediately find a better solution to cross the road, without facing the unruly drivers of Manila, speeding all around the place like Sonic the Hedgehog on sugar rush, do it and live a longer and safer life.