Those FB Photos

Hello, its Christmas season again and work starts getting a little lighter. What better way to celebrate this festive season is to spank in written form anyone who does not use their Facebook photo features properly.

One of the features of Facebook is of course, having your photo published for everyone to see, including your sweaty stalker. Your primary photo’s overall feel, in the essence, is not complicated, not stiff and very presentable since the very first thing a viewer of your profile will look for is your photo.

If your photo is the annoying type, the viewer might not check out your Facebook anymore. Hilarity ensues if your father see your primary photo showing horrible things like doing something inappropriate with a piece of an inanimate object.

Overall, they are just some photos that are highly recommended be placed inside on one of your internal photo albums or better, for the sake of doing good to the world, don’t post it.

Flex, flex, flex and more flex

Showcasing your hard etched body especially abs
There is something unsettling seeing people who does t-shirt lifting to show his abs or flexing around their unnatural muscles. Boasting their physical appearances is a way to compensate of some of their shortcoming, maybe in literal sense or something else. In the end its annoying. I am not in a way jealous seeing people with awesome bodies, just don’t flaunt it around. Yes, I am proud with my abs, 6 packs (of beer) and all.

Duckfacing…. sexy?

The Duckface
A very sad attempt to look sexy. Mostly done by female crowd and a way to do a subtle cock tease for their horny stalker really look stupid. Why a lot of girls do that? stop doing that expression accompanied by a failed gangsta style hand gestured you copied from some guy on Facebook. According to some guy in the Internet, the duckfacing, in his observation, is a way for select women to hide their insecurities . It’s like a false advertisement to the viewers of their photo, kinda like the next one.

Nice…Oh shhhhhh

The Dreaded MySpace angle
Many people around the Internet world loves this angle when they took their own photos. Their preferred room for their personal pictorial is always been the bathroom or their own rooms. This deceiving angle, if placed upper sideways from your body tend to overemphasize your face than your lower body. It is a way to hide something about your body that the world don’t want to see. It’s also a very powerful attention gathering tool, it can fool idiots thinking you have the hottest or yummiest body ever.

MySpace Angle: Dogs love it, Cats still does not care

Named after MySpace because you know, it was popular and THE social site back then, but the angle later scattered other social sites, like the current king of social networking, Facebook.

I am going to effed you up!

The Tough Guy/Look at me I am THE MAN/WOMAN Look
Again, being anonymous in the Internet in a way can cover your real self. You can see this set of lonely people raising havoc in many message boards with their scary typing skills and what not. Accompanied by their over worked muscles and their bad ass tattoos doing not normal shenanigans in their photos. They tend to do the Duckface crap and flaunt to the world-wide web with photos surrounded by whores and man whores, paid by them of course, Their statuses and self-written comments to their own photos, packed with narcissistic nonsense that you wish that an anvil comes from the sky and hits those people who wear ridiculous “gangsta” outfits that they raided (actually bought) in the thrift shops.

Yes! you rock! whoever you are!

Concert/Event + Mobile Phone with built-in motion blur = Can’t see shit
This always happened after a major concert/event ended. In delight we tried our best to take photos with our mobile phone since event security is allergic with high-resolution cameras like a DLSR. Why banned DLSRs? are we going to shoot the performers with our ordinary cameras? With a lot of crap going on like stage lights swirling around  and everyone is moving around on the crowd, 97% of time you will get a blurred shot. If you uploaded it, maybe you can only make out on at least one photo. Don’t bother uploading it

Find your local versions of the photo above

The Douchebag look
You just want to hit the face with the wrench, everyone one of them.

Merry Christmas and thanks for keeping my blog warm when I don’t post!